Top Ten Mustachios

Welcome to the first edition of TK's Top Ten. Before i get stated I have gotten some suggestions that perhaps I should sell food along with the writing and to that I say No. I am not Panda Express. And for that matter I will not issue out clothing for I am not the Express store either.

What is a mustachio? The Mustache.. is a feat that can be pulled off by few, but there are more than few who rock it. The ones who wear the mustache at the expense of themselves bring joy and comedy to this world are what my crew and I call

mustachios

. Of course there are dudes who are awesome with the Stache such as Burt Reynolds, Sean Connery,The Most Interesting Man In The World, Johnny Depp, Jake Masters and Zorro to name a few. But This list is for a far different kind of awesome, and if it weren't for my lack of mental thesaurus books I would describe the awesomeness otherwise. To the dudes who wear the Stache and look like child molesters( but are not) this Top Ten is for you.To The dude that are accompanied by mustaches and can't help but being associated with this music <http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BfdEn0fNdvs&feature=related> This Top Ten Is For You A few months ago I discussed with The Salo..." I really enjoy mustachios, but I am glad I am not one myself" And with that.. number 10


10. Joseph Stalin and Vladimir Lenin - I didn't want to put Hilter because of the tragedy he has caused in our history books, So instead a put a lesser duo of Villains, if you will.

Now you Know why you remember these guys from history class...

Its the Stache

9.Mon.. err Borat - Perhaps a comedy act itself, Borat was a ridiculous movie that was a waste of time. But the mustachio awareness advocated by every scene he was in made me enjoy watching the movie once, and only once...

Very Nice

8. Juan Pierre - A speedster in the MLB, Juan broke in as a young lad and who know what was going through his mind but he challenged the Stache, May be he was trying to look older, who knows but thank goodness he smiled for the camera landing him at number 8.

I still can't understand why he decided to grow one, but I'm sure glad he did.

7. Nick Cage - If you don't know already Nicholas Cage is a walking joke in the acting world already, what better way to top off his mediocre acting skills and monotone voice? That's right a Mustachio.

Not related to Nicholas Naje or Nippleless Naje

6. Yosemite Sam - A child hood cartoon legend, never a star character thanks to the likes of Bugs and Daffy. But this dude balled it up in Space Jam, and he beats out Elmer Fudd any day if you ask me, Not to mention the overwhelming establishment of Mustache that leaves all his facial features to the descriptive "what if's" of children.. Gotta leave more to the imagination is Sam's motto.. I wonder if a real mustache could ever reach the eye brows like Sam's can..

Whats more entertaining than a sharp shooting mustachio in a hat?

5. The Mario Brothers -

Its a Me.

Take Some Plummers, add in some athletic ability but no muscle tone, and sprinkle in a curiously horrific movie and what do you have? Mario Brothers..All 4 of them, probably the most famous mustachio of them all is Mario who brings his crazy Italian family who all hold the genes to make the list. Multi-talented Mario has captivatd children throughout the years with his ability to fight evil and rep all the mustachios around the world.

A little Salvador Dali- like

You gamers take him and his family for granted but would you really play his games if he was mustache-less? I think not!






4. Coming at 4 is Prince. For the attempt to have the best of both worlds. Mustache and no mustache = result- little baby mustache and music that somehow sucks you in to a weird world of purple and and rain... and perhaps a little game of basketball. My boy Dave Jones Chappelle portrays this 3rd place runner up best.

Dear Prince, you are not Clark Gable, you are no Zorro, but thanks for the enjoyment

Sincerely,
That Guy

3. The Medal Rounds kick off with E. Good.

A real team player, E goes the whole nine yards. dress up and all.

A good friend of mine who sacrifices himself for the good of the game. Participant in Mustache March and Novembeard, this dude goes all out and risks his life by growing out the stache in a racist nation that might accuse him of being too ethnic.A great source of imagination if I do say so myself, E. Good you are appreciated in Top Ten Mustachios and in Life.( Events appreciated in, in order of event importance)


Second Place......


2. The Pringles Dude - These tasty chips in their cylindrical container not only provide delicious taste and stair steps to heart disease, they also provide mustachio number one. Funny? Yes! Big and Outlandish? Yes! Mustache to body ratio above 65%? Of Course! This one has got it all. Not to mention that borderline girly dude smirk. Gosh Pringles dude, you are mustachio number 2.

Oh Yah AND a Bowtie!

The Winner Is..

1. Proffessor Chaos Buttas - An experiment that was not triggered by any event other than the thought of " perhaps I will never shave again" Buttas was taken away and sealed away in a tomb, and on Easter morning the door was miraculously opened and Buttas came out alive with a new friend.. Stachia. This mustache not only scared me, but it haunted me because once I played basketball with it, and Buttas too. A historical event in my life time. I hope to never see this again...And due to the mere fear that this Stache will attack me in the night, This is Mustachio number 1.

Not to mention his shirt has a mustache as well..

... No Words Today Fellow Readers... No Words..

Notable Runners Up: Gimli (LOTR), Magnum PI, Chaplin,Derrick Rose, Dr. Watson,Captain Hook and Rollie Fingers, and CJ Wilsons Yahoo Profile Pic < http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/players/7571 >


"How Bout That Guy!"

-ThaTKy